Monday, August 2, 2010

Not To Inform, But To Affirm

I have a tendency to be short with people, especially when I am asked to repeat myself or if I am being given information that I am already aware of.  It's a fault, I admit, though I do try to get better about it.  One of the things that helps me is realizing ways that it can be a good thing.

When I am told something, I always make the assumption that the other person is telling me something they believe I don't know (unless explicitly noted).  This just isn't always the case.  Sometimes people are saying things not to inform, but to affirm.

When your husband or wife says "I love you", it isn't because they thought you didn't know.  It's because they are affirming that love, making it no longer an unspoken understanding.  Also, when it comes to things that can change (like love, looks, life status), affirming is nice.  It makes us sure that things are as they were (assuming you believe that status quo is a good thing).

My writing is also affected by my shortness.  I assume that every line of every paragraph needs to further the plot.  People who repeat themselves are worsening their own stories.  And although here is a limit of how much repetition is ok, the occasional reminder is nice.  Affirm that things are as they were (or at least as they should be) and that we haven't glossed over anything important.

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