Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Simple Fix

Donovan sat himself down under a tree and pulled out a handkerchief. He wiped some sweat from his head and set it on his lap. A cool breeze blew by and brought out a relaxing sigh. He lay down with earbuds in, shut his eyes, and listened to the music on his phone.

Before the first song ended, the music was cut off by an incoming call. Donovan answered without opening his eyes.

"Hey Em. - Yeah, I just went out to the park to clear my head. It was getting kind of stuffy inside. - That's a simple fix. Just unplug the laptop, take out the battery, and hold the power button for 30 seconds. Then put it all back together and it should be working fine. If it's still funky, I'll take a look when I get back."

The call ended and the music returned, along with another sigh. He loved Emily. She was so cute. It felt great being able to help her, though at some point, he hoped she would remember what he did to fix things and just take care of them herself if they went wrong again.

*Ding* New text message. Donovan pulls out his phone to read it.

From Sam: B/f  sit on the couch playing xbox all day, then calls me fat! sooooo angry!!!!!!

Donovan hit reply: Simple fix. Call him an asshole and walk out. Crash at my place until you find a new one.

He knew Sam wouldn't take him up on the offer. Sam never takes him up on the offer; never takes the advice, either.

As soon as Donovan put his phone away, he heard the email beep. It was from his boss at work.

Don, we need to print out mailing labels, but we don't have the time to copy and paste all the entries. Help. - Jean

 Simple fix. Just do a search for "mail merge" online and you'll find a guide. It'll take you no time. - Don

He knew that people aren't born with an instinct to consult the internet with any and all problems, but it's hardly a new invention. At some point, somebody in business would need to figure that much out, right? Hopefully they'll figure it out before he retires.

Donovan put his head down again and listened to his tunes for a while. All the ambient noise ran together and melted away. He felt a deep calmness as though from meditation. Then the ambient noise got louder. He opened his eyes and saw his friend Michael looking down at him.

"Oh man, Donny, I can't believe I ran into you here. So I was at work and my boss was bitching me out about something that wasn't even my fault, again, and so I finally just told him to go fuck himself, if he is going to be that retarded."

Donovan took out his earbuds and stood up, brushing the grass off his butt. "Simple..." he began to say, but he noticed Michael's face. He was smiling, ecstatic. He wasn't complaining or asking for advice. He got himself out of an abusive work environment all on his own

"Simply amazing," Donovan told him. "Congratulations dude. Let me take you out to a celebratory I-quit-my-shitty-job dinner. On me, of course."

Michael graciously accepted and continued on his jog. Donovan looked on with a smile, and felt a splash from the pond land on his cheek. He wiped it off with his handkerchief, put it away, and headed back home. He hoped that getting the laptop work actually was a simple fix.

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