Look Backward And Forward

Today, I managed to take a step back and realize that my life is pretty damn amazing right now. Like, I had the thought that if I talked to myself from any number of years ago about everything that happened today, I would struggle to believe it was true.

The reason this was such a strong realization for me is that during most of today, I was thinking about how much further I still have to go.  I'm not at the top of the mountain. Some days I feel like I have barely begun to even climb it. But in reality, I've made significant progress. Just because there is a lot left to go does not mean that I haven't already come a long way.

And that really illuminates the life lesson that is often ignored: The journey of one's life is not a short one. We go through so many stages, rise through so many levels. Even after we have grown and developed and may feel like full adults, we will go through so many more changes beyond it.  It is very difficult to comprehend this concept, which is why we need to look backward and forward.

It is easy to lose yourself in how much more you have left to go. Don't let that diminish how far you have already come.

Survival As Victory

In conversation, I had the thought that, "sometimes just surviving is a victory." It was an interesting concept to me. It reminded me of the saying that you have to keep running faster just to stay in place. And yet, it wasn't quite that.

Victory is all about gaining. You have something new that you've acquired through some kind of competition. And yet, sometimes people have to "fight for their lives". In that case, they aren't trying to gain something new; they're trying to prevent a loss.

Sometimes, knowing that you haven't lost is a victory, too. Being able to "fight another day" means that the battle isn't over; it means that we can keep trying. In that sense, as long as you have a chance to win, you can keep doing it until you do grab that victory.

Friend vs. Ally

I find it interesting that the opposite of "enemy" is often given as "friend", but every now and then, it is also said to be "ally".  And yet, nobody ever uses "friend" and "ally" as synonyms.

An ally is one who helps you with a task. Allies have the same goals, and so they choose to work together to accomplish that goal.

Friends are more than that, but also quite different. Friends help us through life. They ease our burden and strengthen our resolve. They may have very different goals in life, but friends stick together and better each other.

I think this curiosity also goes to show that "enemy" is a more peculiar word than we might realize. An enemy could be somebody who is specifically trying to thwart your goals in life, or it could be somebody who simply hates you as a human being.

It is definitely worth exploring the different ways in which a person could be considered an enemy.

Crutches

The way we talk about crutches is weird. They're usually described as a negative thing. Crutches are something we lean on. They take our burden for us. They ultimately make us weaker because we never need to rise to our potential. 

But if crutches are so bad, then why do people use literal crutches every day? Crutches serve a purpose. They help us when we're weak. They get us through bad times. They aid us as we recover our strength. 

Crutches are not bad; they're simply temporary in need. 

If You're Understood, You're Doing It Right

Continuing from my previous post, I want to say that, regardless of how I might feel about people incorrectly using the word "impacted", it's really not my call to decide if a word is right or wrong. If you say "impacted" and everybody knows that you mean "made an impact", then that is what "impacted" means.

Too many people love to go on tirades about words being used incorrectly. They make essays and articles and books and infographics. But at the end of the day, what makes a word right or wrong? Why do you think your understanding of a word is the only valid one?

Language is an agreed upon construct. If people know what you mean, the you're doing it right. When you are a child and literally don't know language, then you have to be taught. You have to be told what is right and what is wrong. But this is because language already exists beyond you as a child need to know what is already agreed upon.

However, every generation, kids end up making their own language that they speak with one another. It's full of slang and colloquialisms. It is rife with words that do not exist in the dictionary and probably never will. But it doesn't matter because they understand each other. In this case, they understand one another, so their language is fine and effective.

This process is also why language changes every single generation. Don't bemoan or rebuke it. Just enjoy it and go with the flow. Know what people mean and we will do the same for you.

Impacted

I was asked to write a post on the word "impact", specifically about its use as a verb. So that's what I'm doing tonight. (If you have any special requests, you are always welcome to contact me.)

To begin with, 'impact' is fairly well known as a noun. An impact is basically a collision. When a meteor strikes the earth, it leaves an impact crater; this is literally a crater that was formed at the point (and time) of impact. 

In theory, the verb form of the word seems obvious. If you want to change the world, then you want to impact it, right? Well, sadly it's not right. 

When you use it as a verb, 'impact' basically means 'packed in'. So if you want to impact people, it means you want to cram them into a small area. 

Generally, what people mean is that they want to make an impact on people. 

Whenever people use 'impacted' my first thought is the example where I learned the word: people who are constipated have impacted feces in their intestines. Because of this connection, whenever I hear somebody say they were impacted, my mind says "you're full of shit."

The word most people mean to use is "affect". You affect people, not impact them. As a writer, I do make sure to use the right words in this case, and my knee jerk reaction is skin crawling when I hear it. 

Opinions Are Like Assholes

One of my favorite sayings of all time is, "Opinions are like assholes: everybody has one and nobody thinks theirs stinks." It's remarkably true and brilliant in its analogy and wordplay. 

This saying also explains why I place very little value in opinions. They aren't rare and they don't need any experience or research to create. Anybody who tells me that something is true just because it is what they believe has given me zero reason to believe them. 

The thing to remember is that not all opinions are equal. Opinions don't need experience or research, but if you base your opinions on those things, it gives your words far more weight and value. 

For example, of I show you a shape with three sides on it, you could say, "In my opinion, that is a square." You would be completely wrong, but it would still be your opinion. If you were able to provide some sort of evidence for why the shape is a square, then your opinion might be worth more, but as a mere declaration, it holds very little water. 

Be careful when dealing with opinions, and assholes, and assholes with opinions. They all have their problems, and much strife can be avoided by avoiding them.